Tuesday, April 12, 2011

When You Have Done Everything Else Together

We're getting older. We have been together a very long time. We've laughed together, played together, prayed together, created children together, even cried, screamed, ranted, and raved at each other. Yet the other day, we did something that most couples never have an opportunity to do together.

When hubby got home that evening we shared a light supper, then slowly began to drink what appeared to be something like a koolaide cocktail. No, it's not what you think, we weren't trying to do ourselves in - although it might have felt like it at times.

Next morning we awoke early, showered (alas not together), dressed and were out the door by 6 am. It was an hour's drive and we passed the time in silence, each lost in our own thoughts and apprehensions. Yet before we knew it we were at the door. We stopped, hugged each other, squared our shoulders and went in.

The receptionist met us and asked for our paperwork - and money, somewhat over five hundred dollars. I remember thinking that was more than we paid for our first car. Anyway, after that process was completed we took our seats and began staring at the Today Show but not really seeing what was going on. Pretty soon our youngest daughter arrived, a little later her older sister arrived - necessities in getting us home later.

After awhile hubby's name was called and he disappeared behind a set of ominous looking doors. Soon they were calling for me. I felt like a prisoner walking to the gas chamber. A nurse touched my arm and said not to worry, all would be well.

A well worn gown was given to me with instructions to remove all my clothes except my black knee high socks, don the gown, climb into bed, and wait. Hubby, I was assured was safe in another cubicle and, I assume, participating in the same ritual as I. Once I was settled, the same nurse returned with a mile long list of questions I had to answer and a IV bottle and foot long needle to be inserted into my dehydrated little vein.

Eventually youngest daughter was allowed to sit with me. She said her daddy was just fine, and our older daughter was sitting with him to assure he did not grab his clothes and run.

So by now you will have deduced that we were sharing outpatient surgery - matching colonocopies to be exact. We told the nurses we gave them to each other for Valentine's Day. They thought that was very romantic. I thought of all the things I might ask for on Valentine's Day - a colonocopy was not one of them.

Few people, I am sure, ever get a chance to see inside there colons - why would they want to - but I woke up during mine and watched the monitor as the scope traveled slowed inside of me (not as gross as one might think thanks to the koolaide cocktail the day before). Then I was being awakened again and wheeled into the recovery room right next to hubby who was having a really good time laughing and joking with the nurses and our two daughters. There we were even given pictures that were taken during the procedures - we're thinking of framing them and hanging them in the hallway.

After a few mintues our clothes were returned to us and we dressed and made our way to the cars. Youngest daughter, who just happens to be a nurse, drove her daddy home - his request because he wanted the best medical care with him. Older daughter, while not medically trained but much more sympathetic, drove our car, which is more comfortable anyway. We made our way home stopping only to eat since the previous day's food was in liquid form. Hubby, who we thought would be such a baby over this, ate a ten course meal. I ate scrambled eggs. At home hubby became a ball of energy and worked around the house all day. I went to bed and slept for twelve hours.

So all-in-all, this was not a bad experience, not one I would want to do everyday but to tell you the truth, it was almost (almost) fun, and I would certainly recommend that couples do this together. I wonder if Hallmark will ever print a card that says "The couple who..." well, you can fill in the rest.

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